BEAT:girl comes back

Man, I don't believe the last few days i've had. I said i'd never play poker again but I went to sleep and woke up like I had to get back in action. I found some collectable items (action man) and got 99 dollars each for 2 still in their boxes, the guy haggled a dollar, I figured I would either load up 4 tables of 50nl or look around the house for more stuff to sell. My girl has a nice mirror and exercise bike so I put them out on the front lawn with a sign saying "you want? Cash" and I couldn't believe whena few hours later some lady with massive earrings and a chiwowa showed up and offerd me 300 bucks! I was like mentally working out how many buy ins that was at 50nl.So the next day, i'm feeling better about life even though I lost around 138k because at least I got a roll now so decided to order pizza and play some hands. I played all afternoon and just broke even, but then arouns 8pm I was back to 745 dollars..

while I was playing I started thinking about how far behind my original amount I was so I was like **** it!,lets crank it up to some 1/2. I ran like rats. OMGGGGGGGGDZZZZZZZZZZZZ I flopped a wheel and that **** fell off by the river. I was so angry I picked up one of my binders that I keep some old papers in and hit my head with it numerous timeswhile calling myself degrading things.I decided to take a break because I was shaking a little. I kept imagining that smug grin of phil galfond and I got really tilted. I decided to watch some porno which was a really bad decision. While I was watvhing it my girlfriend came back "to talk" and I didn;t hear her come in. I was jacking it when she walked in, and it was a crazy japanese hentai porn and am sure I was groaning a little, and this cartoon guy was about to ejaculate when he started shouting and turned into some space rocket and im like thinking WTF, but I still know im going to come (really embarrasing) then my girl called my name so I stood up with mess all over me I tripped over my boxers and I have no clue why but I just blurted out "porn is not poker!" and pulled my shorts up.my Girlfriend was like "OMGZZZ i cant believe I come all the way back here to see you and you are sitting there watching ungoldy things on the internet and disrespecting me!!" I was like wtfff...this is my ****ing house you are insane arent you troll? She picks up a remote and threw that **** right at me and it hit my wireless mouse and the battery flew out ad im thinking oh**** how ami gonna multitable if she broke it...

I was so maddddd, I lunged at her and missed her with my elbow, then she brought up that I lost her poodle im like that was so long ago! I said git out but she wouldnt leave, cus she wanted her stuff She noticed the mirror and I had to tell her some lie about feng shui and how I left the bike somewhere but my memory was impaired...so she starts blubbing and I said "all u do is cryyyyyy u havent even lost any parents!!!!!!!!" (she hasnt) and omgz she went BAT **** CRAZY and came at me, she got really close to my face and that is the first time that I noticed her nose hairs..please dont judge me I dont know why I did this, but I was so mad that I ripped off a giant lampshade and stuck that sh1t on her head..OMGZ she is still here upstairs hopefully packing stuff and I want her out...I need to get back to 25nl I got grind on the mind